Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Oh Jesus

Last year in Gospel Choir at APU we sang a song called "Oh Jesus." Each part, soprano, alto, and tenor, had a unique melody to sing that wove themselves in and out of each other, creating an intricate and moving testimony to the tenderness, power, truth, justice, and love of Christ. I almost never was able to sing that song without tears coming to my eyes. It spoke to my heart of all God is and all He has been to me. In times of trials, it reminded me of His faithfulness. In times of joy, it reminded me of His greatness. In times of saddness, it reminded me of His nearness. In times of struggle, it reminded me of His calling. We sang it at the beginning of most of our concerts and it had a remarkable ability to set a tone of humility and of joy and of a sheer desire to worship the Living God for singers and listeners alike. The most amazing part, though, is that the song only consisted of two words, "Oh Jesus."

I was walking last night watching one of the most beautiful sunsets I have ever seen and I started thinking about this song. I didn't plan it, but as I watched the sun slowly sink through the greying sky and into the heavy rain clouds painted orange and pink and purple on their edges, the words just came to my lips, "Oh Jesus." And even as I sang them, I saw something else. Just beyond the rain clouds there was a clearing. Through it I could see blue sky lit from behind with all the radiance of the sun, stubbornly refusing to dim its light even as it was on its way to rest for the night.

God has been speaking to me over the past few days and weeks in ways that I am not able to fully understand. But what I do understand is that He is so much more than I know. Because of the things I have seen over the past weeks here, those words, "Oh Jesus," somehow mean more to me than they did a month ago. They have more power. They carry more weight. They touch me in a deeper place. And still I know that there is more. Last night I was so focused on the beauty of the clouds in the sunset that I almost missed seeing the brilliance of the sunshine behind them. In the same way, God was showing me that, as beautiful as I think the things are that He is showing me now, this is only the beginning. There is more. He is more.


Thank you all so much for your continued prayers. I can assure you that they have been powerful! Please continue to pray for my last few days here - that I would not slow down, that I would find ways to be a blessing, and that I would give all that I have and all that I am so that I will leave with a peaceful spirit. I miss you all so much!

much love,
erin

6 comments:

Kacy said...

that is beau-Tee-ful.

I am so glad you are soaking up our great, great God while you are there and listening to Him in the ways He is singing to you. Praying that you are pressing on, smiling a ton, learning more about who God is and who you are, learning how to make chapati, staying healthy, and making memories that will last forever. (obviously)

Can't wait to see you again, but I wish I was coming to Kenya to see you!

I love you and am thinking about you often!

Anonymous said...

Erin, Your words are very moving. I'm very happy to hear that a sunset can be so meaningful and inspiring to you and your thoughts. I can relate to that as in my time in Hawaii where I would sit for hours in a private area of the beach and watch the sun go down. I don't think I got as deep of thought out of it as you but never the less it gave me a great feeling of rest and rejuvenation and made things not look so bad.
Anyway we will keep you in our thoughts and prayers for safe travels until you return home. It was great to hear from you this morning. I called Chris/Erica and Gretta and let them know you were OK. God Bless your Proud Parents and Family, Dad and Lisa

Too Many Brain Tabs said...

Oh man...I hadn't thought about that song in so long. I want to be in gospel choir again just to sing it. Or we can just make our own gospel choir in our house and sing it together. :P I just got in to work a while ago and it's a gloomy, overcast morning and stuff just feels kinda weird. But reading your words and remembering similar sunsets I got to experience in Romania is such a reminder to me of God's nearness in times of sadness. I'm not even really sure why I feel sad, but I'm praising and thanking Jesus for being near to me on this dreary morning. AND I'm praising Him because you are coming home soon!! I know that it will probably be hard for you to say goodbye to Africa, because your heart is there. But I also know that God has amazing things planned for you here as well, and I can't wait to see them unfold.

I love you!!

Alayna said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Alayna said...

Haven't been on facebook like at all so did not realize this website was up. Read it all tonight in one sitting! Now I have some serious gaps filled in of the past month that I have been praying for you. You will be back in like six days but at least I have a better idea of HOW to pray for you. i am so glad that there was so much growth and "god moments" in africa and that the team had a impactful time. i love you and can't wait for you to return back to california (although i know it will be a transition!) talk to you soon! and enjoy your random london trip!

Anonymous said...

Hi Erin,

I am keeping you in my prayers....Thank you for con't to write of the beauty of the Father as you see Him and what He has for you... No one can do a sunset/rise like Him!
Hugs to you!
Jo :)